Monday, February 6, 2017

Five Ways to Model Love for Kids

I have always found the Five Love Languages to be pretty interesting - especially since I tend to fall into different categories based on my mood. I need to have the husband take the quiz at some point but I'm going to guess that he probably ranks high in quality time like I do. Then again, I could be wrong. When I saw that the love languages was the prompt for #LoveBlog today, I headed over to the website to see what sort of inspiration I could find. The first thing that jumped out at me was the fact that they now have a section about the love languages and kids. Needless to say, that's where the inspiration for today's post came from.

I'm a firm believer that kids are shaped by their experiences.This is why it's important to think about the experiences that your child is being exposed to - even when it comes to something as simple (or complicated?) as love. There is a lot of research and respect for the five long languages and I think that the love languages can be a basis for how you model love for kids. I do think that exposure to all sorts of love is best to help a child be well-rounded and respectful of others as an adult. Today, I'm sharing how I intend to use the love languages to model love for my own children.

Words of Affirmation
Individuals with this love language thrive on praise and the things that are said to them. One rule I have for myself is making sure that "I love you" is always the last thing a loved one hears from me. (Seriously - I'll call someone back just to add that bit if needed.) I intend to follow through on this unspoken rule with my children. "I love you" and other positive phrases will be used often in our home.

Acts of Service
For these individuals, actions speak louder than words. I intend to model this love language by following through on what I say and encouraging others to do the same. This means being conscious of the promises you make with a child and keeping them. For example, if you tell a child that you'll do something with them later, it's a good idea to follow through.

Receiving Gifts
This one is exactly what it says - these individuals associate love with receiving gifts. While we have talked about keeping gifts to a minimum, we do intend to give gifts for holidays and special occasions. We simply want to make sure that we focus on quality over quantity.

Quality Time
For these individuals, spending time together is important. For children, this can be modeled in many different ways - including turning off cell phones during certain activities, playing together, and creating predictable routines that are centered around time spent together (such as a bedtime routine). Since this tends to be my love language, there are a lot of ideas I can think of for this one, but I think that might be a post for another time.

Physical Touch
These individuals value touch and associate it with love. I can sum this one up with hugs and kisses, X's and O's - however you want to phrase it. Basically, I want my kids to know that hugs and kisses are okay from the right people. With kids, this particular love language comes with barriers that must be taught as well.

Which is your love language? Do you feel it's important to model all of the love languages for children or do you believe in focusing on just one?

We're linking up with Belle Brita for #LoveBlog this month!

LoveBlog with Belle Brita

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  1. Your new baby (and any future kids) is so lucky to have you for a mom! What a great list of ways to model love to your children.

  2. What a wonderful model for loving children. I'm not a mommy yet, but I love getting ideas from people who already are.

  3. I love your take on acts of service as following through on what you say you'll do. I've never really considered that in this category but you're totally right! And it's so important!

  4. Love these tips! Especially the physical love. My mom always rubbed our feet and scratched our backs. My husband's did not. You can tell a real difference in how we communicate our feelings and show love.